Today Jonathan turns 15 weeks old... yes... 15! I can't believe how much he has gown, changed and learned in the last 15 weeks. Already he can smile and laugh, he knows how to get attention when he wants it, he jabbers with us all the time in that special baby language. But Sunday I had a realization... I am so thankful that God gave me a boy!
I remember when Jeff and I first found out we were having a boy. We had wanted a girl so bad; I was so anxious for a girl so I could crochet all sorts of cute, frilly stuff for her. A few hours after we got home from the doctor I broke down crying. I couldn't understand it. I wanted to be so happy I was having a boy but I was so totally disappointed! I felt horrible because I had no desire to make anything for my boy and I felt like it meant that I didn't love him. It took me a day or two but I finally accepted the fact that we were having a boy and I found some equally adorable patterns for things I could make him. Eventually I was so excited for this little boy!
Now, 15 weeks later, I am so thankful for him. God knew exactly what he was doing for us. This boy is wonderful and quite honestly, the best thing we have ever been blessed with. The giggles he gives me when I look at him and see him trying to get the pacifier back in his mouth with just his tongue, the snuggles I get when he awakens at 5am scared of storms, even the little conversations we have while he just jabbers away. I find myself praying over him at night as I feed him his bedtime bottle. I thank God for him, for this blessing, and I pray that he grows to love and glorify God.